How to know when he’s ready? Actions.

A young couple I met taught me a lesson I need to share to everybody, may it be young or not. They’ve been together for more than a year and they are obviously in love with each other. Upon talking to them, they’ve been spurring out that they badly wanna get married. That they wanted to get married the soonest because they cannot keep fighting the feeling of being away from each other. They wanted to have God’s permission so they can do whatever they wanna do and apply what the bible have taught with regards to couples [married people]. They also want to have God’s blessing, they’re tired resisting temptation and did not want to sin against him [they’re talking about premarital sex]. As the conversation went deeper, the guy excused himself as he will be going to the comfort room.

The moment he stood up, I glanced on the girls face and noticed her emotion in her grimaces. I asked what’s bothering her, she spilled “He keeps telling me he wanted to get married so baaad. He wanted me to be the first thing he will see in the morning and the last person he will see before he goes to sleep. He wants me. Everything, everywhere. He wants the feeling of not having to worry when’s the next day we’re going to see each other. He wants to see me in his home when he leaves and arrives.” I saw her crooked a smile and then eventually turned sad, “but… I think he’s not yet really ready. I don’t know. I have no idea if it’s just me or is this really coming from my obnoxious observations. I wan to get married so bad too! I love him so much!” I could see tears building up in her eyes. “I don’t understand”.

Let me end the story there and tell you what I told her instead. You see, if you are in the stage of not knowing what to do or not understanding what’s happening, or even to the point of you, feeling like you do not know your partner anymore, watch his actions.

Because apparently, he may keep on saying he wants this and that but does not have any signs of wanting something. From then on, you need to ask him upfront and then start evaluating the status of your relationship.

Say for example, your partner may keep on saying that he wants to buy that new Ford ranger pick up so bad but does not work hard to buy it. Does not constantly verbalize his desire of having one nor set aside some of his earnings to save for it. He said he wants it but his actions does not show it. His actions does not tell you that he really wanna have one. He does not even take a screenshot or printscreen of an image of a ford ranger.

His actions will flaunt it. Believe me, if not then might as well do not settle for less.

His actions will flaunt it. Believe me, if not then might as well do not settle for less.

Now, come to think of it, if that example applies to anything you have noticed on your man or woman, how much more when it comes on settling down with you?

Something Nice from Nice

Made me wanna go visit NICE!

CATHERINE RYAN HOWARD

I’m in Nice.

If you’ve been following this blog for a while, you’ll know that this isn’t my first time in Nice. For 6-8 weeks every Autumn for three years beginning in 2011 – I’ll give you a moment to catch your breath after that weird sentence construction – I came here, supposedly, to write. That sounds very decadent, I know, but I was living with my parents at the time and had no real financial responsibilities. (Now I have rent to pay in Dublin “The Rent On This Telephone Box Will Make Your Eyes Water” City and university fees to cover, so it all balances out.) Plus the work I was doing was freelance, so all I needed to do it was a laptop and an internet connection. 

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In 2009, I’d rented a somewhat isolated holiday home near the sea in East Cork for a six week period that started…

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Do not settle with the thought of finding a man who just loves you more

People kept saying that find a man who loves you more or a guy who exceeds the love you give in return. Yes, he may love you more than you do to him but haven’t you realized that is being selfish? You want to be with someone who’s not gonna leave you, someone who’s going to stay forever. You are too full of the idea of yourself being in someone’s arms for years that you forgot the effect of those “ideals” to your man.

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Be kind to your man. Give back. Be fair to each other. No one should feel inferior

My friend, we (women) are made not for men to spoil us nor provide all the dream we have. God made us to help them. Stop measuring love. If he loves you, love him back. If he loves you so much, love him so much! If he fails to remind you that he loves you, continue loving him and do not be driven by what the world dictates to not keep a man who doesn’t love you more. Remind him through acts of love and he will do the same if you’re the one who forgets.

Let us understand that this is not a measurement of who loves more, rather if he loves the Lord. I know that the point of you wanting to be loved more, is so that he will not leave you. Hey, if your man loves God? I tell you, he is more likely to stay. He will endure. He loves God so much that he obeys Him. He would not want to hurt God by hurting you; the helpmate God created for him.

Now, if your man loves you more but does not love God? Rethink. He may fail and break your heart into pieces again and would not even mind. But if he loves the Lord our God? His faith to God itself will strengthen your relationship.

Copyright © 2015. grasyamorefoi

All rights reserved.

Genuine love from cheap people? Don’t even presume.

Adolescents nowadays are fond of hopping from one guy/girl to another; boys exchanging girlfriends from the same circle of friends. I am very much saddened seeing teenagers posting on social medias about what they are looking for towards a guy. Not even realizing that the guy who will love them for reals would not need to see those posts, nor need to be nagged about what they “ideally” search for a man. This goes the same for guys out there towards a girl.

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Genuine love goes through a process. A couple for 50 years didn’t reach that stage without tough molding and continuous learning process.

You know what they say, YOU CANNOT FIND THE ONE WHO WILL TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY IN CLUBS OR BARS. If you are jealous of relationships lasting long despite imperfections, then you need to wake up and step away from worldly assumptions of finding the love of your life. You cannot expect genuine love from cheap people. You cannot expect to be taken seriously from the people you just met on facebook (w/c can 98% of the time, be disguising to be a handsome looking guy or a sexy chick) nor from people you just danced within clubs and had pre-game with at the bar.

Ladies and gentlemen, the person of your life whom you have been dreaming about? Can be found from decent places, introduced to you by a friend of a mutual friend and a believer of God. I don’t literally mean cheap people, it’s somewhat like a metaphor of cheap instances where you found the person you can brag about to your friends. You found cheap love because you were in a hurry, you’re too desperate to have one, so you didn’t bother to assess the quality of the love you’re going to have.

You need to discern the most genuine from what is mostly a distraction. Stop “fitting in” to the world. You will not find your happiness from the love story of others; basically from those people you’ve been stalking on social media. YOU NEED NOT TO LIKE WHAT THEY LIKE nor COPY THE STANDARDS THEY HAVE IN MIND FOR A RELATIONSHIP. Seek God and genuine love will be the one to find you 🙂

 Copyright © 2015 grasyamorefoi.wordpress

All Rights Reserved

Within me.

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Since grade school, I have always been fond of writing and public speaking. However, during college, been too busy with deadlines and more and more quizzes that I get no time to pursue my passion for writing essays or poems or stories. I am not superb on blogging; not even close on exquisite photo shooting, yet I feel the desire within me to start talking, start sharing my thoughts and learnings to people; technically, to start from scratch.

You see, I have faith that made me pursue this passion. And I know that babysteps can go a loooooong way 🙂

 Copyright © 2015. grasyamorefoi

All Rights Reserved